Call me crazy, but that's kind of weird...
And not Grammy appropriate. Seriously Paris!
Monday, February 9, 2009
30 Going on 13
Paris wore this to the Grammy Awards and um....the dress from 13 Going on 30 anybody? Just in purple rather than teal.
Call me crazy, but that's kind of weird...
And not Grammy appropriate. Seriously Paris!
Call me crazy, but that's kind of weird...
And not Grammy appropriate. Seriously Paris!
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Got Me Tucked up in Your Pocket
I usually don't consider myself the romantic. People hate watching chick flicks with me because I make fun of everything. I am not a fan of roses. Fairytale undertones bother me (unless we're talking Pretty Woman). But recently I watched He's Just Not That Into You and I didn't regret it for a second.
If I had to rate myself, I would say that I am about 33% girly. That's puts me just a little bit over a quarter...that sounds about right. So if you are a guy who considers them self around 33% girly, this movie would probably work out for you, too. The feminist in me would like to say that everything in the movie is built around cliches and exaggerations. We are not that pathetic and helpless. Everyone has something to work on, and sometimes there's a bad egg...but all in all, we are a little more self-empowered than that.
That being said...Ginnifer Goodwin was about the cutest thing to happen to cinema. Her wardrobe was great. And I don't care what you say, I still love Jennifer Connelly...pig-tails, stiff personality, and all. Her knock-out performance in the Labyrinth makes me a forever loyal fan. I want Scarlett to get the whole singing thing out of her system...and someone needs to tell me what the Wiccan at the wedding reception was all about. The other problem with the movie was the heavy female population which meant a lot of gasping at the romantic or surprise moments, and that...I could have done without. Otherwise I accepted it, even the cheesy parts. For any takers, I am ready to see it again.
Friday, February 6, 2009
But I Want, Want, Want to be Your Love
If you were to ask me, "Maggie Jean....who do you consult in a time of crisis? Who is your life coach?"
I would tell you...without out hesitation, "Oh. That's easy. Handsdown, 100%, blinkin' Lincoln, easy-peezy-lemon-squeezy. That person would be Rachael Yamagata."
So you can imagine my delight when I found out that Rachael will be playing in New York the same time that I will be there. Everything about it is perfect. She is playing at a small winery: intimate. Tickets are cheap: VIP = $38. Location: Close to my hotel...
However, everything hits the fan after that because she is playing at a very inconvenient time. I am going to New York for the National Model United Nations Conference (very excited) and we will be in conference for an indefinite amount of time each day...possibly keeping me from the best concert of my life. So here is my dilemma...do I buy tickets in hopes that I can possibly go or accept reality and let the dream pass me by?
New York...you're breaking my heart already.
I would tell you...without out hesitation, "Oh. That's easy. Handsdown, 100%, blinkin' Lincoln, easy-peezy-lemon-squeezy. That person would be Rachael Yamagata."
So you can imagine my delight when I found out that Rachael will be playing in New York the same time that I will be there. Everything about it is perfect. She is playing at a small winery: intimate. Tickets are cheap: VIP = $38. Location: Close to my hotel...
However, everything hits the fan after that because she is playing at a very inconvenient time. I am going to New York for the National Model United Nations Conference (very excited) and we will be in conference for an indefinite amount of time each day...possibly keeping me from the best concert of my life. So here is my dilemma...do I buy tickets in hopes that I can possibly go or accept reality and let the dream pass me by?
New York...you're breaking my heart already.
You're A Wolf
Today I saw someone who was sporting a Spiderman backpack and a mustache.
.
.
.
Guy or Girl?
.
.
.
WRONG - It was a girl.
She must be a fellow Portugue, but still girl...clean that mess up.
.
.
.
Guy or Girl?
.
.
.
WRONG - It was a girl.
She must be a fellow Portugue, but still girl...clean that mess up.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
20 Interesting Things About Moi
1. I'm on the third day of my cleanse diet. All I have to do is drink maple syrup, lemon juice, cayenne pepper and water for all three meals. Um, I just bought some bikinis online too so.. I'm gonna look amazing.
2. I lie every second of the day. My whole life is a sham.
3. I love babies. I think they are beautiful in all sorts of different ways. I try to pick up and hold a baby every day, if possible, because it nourishes me.
4. I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name.
5. Sometimes I download pirated music onto my work computer.
6. I've been involved in a number of cults. Both as a leader and a follower. I had more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader.
7. I believe most Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
8. I'm petrified of nipple chaffing. Once it starts it is a vicious circle... you have sensitive nipples, they chaff, so they become more sensitive, so they chaff more. So I take precautions.
9. When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No, I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.
10. Society teaches us that, having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Well, that's baloney, because grief isn't wrong. There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown.
11. A few years ago my family was on a safari in Africa, and my cousin Mufasa was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeests. We all took it really hard, all of us kind of in the audience of what happened.
12. I knew this girl who, like, had this crazy freak out because she took too many behavioral meds at once and she like ripped off her clothes, and dove into the fountain at Ridgedale Mall and was like, "Blagh! I am a Kraken from the sea!
13. I come from a long line of fighters. My maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War Two veteran, killed twenty men and spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp. My father battled blood pressure and obesity all his life. Different kind of fight.
14. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: “Mankind”. Basically, it's made up of two separate words—“mank” and “ind”. What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
15. Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me? Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
16. Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.
17. I'm personal friends with Obi-Wan Kenobi
18. I love gentiles. In fact, on of my favorite activities is Protestant spotting.
19. One day, for no particular reason, I decided to go for a little run. My Momma always said you got to put the past behind you before you can move on. And I think that's what my running was all about. I had run for three years, two months, fourteen days, and sixteen hours.
20. So, here's some advice I wish I woulda got when I was your age: Live every week like it's Shark Week.
2. I lie every second of the day. My whole life is a sham.
3. I love babies. I think they are beautiful in all sorts of different ways. I try to pick up and hold a baby every day, if possible, because it nourishes me.
4. I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name.
5. Sometimes I download pirated music onto my work computer.
6. I've been involved in a number of cults. Both as a leader and a follower. I had more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader.
7. I believe most Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
8. I'm petrified of nipple chaffing. Once it starts it is a vicious circle... you have sensitive nipples, they chaff, so they become more sensitive, so they chaff more. So I take precautions.
9. When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No, I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.
10. Society teaches us that, having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Well, that's baloney, because grief isn't wrong. There's such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown.
11. A few years ago my family was on a safari in Africa, and my cousin Mufasa was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeests. We all took it really hard, all of us kind of in the audience of what happened.
12. I knew this girl who, like, had this crazy freak out because she took too many behavioral meds at once and she like ripped off her clothes, and dove into the fountain at Ridgedale Mall and was like, "Blagh! I am a Kraken from the sea!
13. I come from a long line of fighters. My maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War Two veteran, killed twenty men and spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp. My father battled blood pressure and obesity all his life. Different kind of fight.
14. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: “Mankind”. Basically, it's made up of two separate words—“mank” and “ind”. What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
15. Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me? Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
16. Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.
17. I'm personal friends with Obi-Wan Kenobi
18. I love gentiles. In fact, on of my favorite activities is Protestant spotting.
19. One day, for no particular reason, I decided to go for a little run. My Momma always said you got to put the past behind you before you can move on. And I think that's what my running was all about. I had run for three years, two months, fourteen days, and sixteen hours.
20. So, here's some advice I wish I woulda got when I was your age: Live every week like it's Shark Week.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Diamond Dogs
I would like to introduce Cornwallis....sometimes know as Wallace by the sensitive, patriotic crowd...and sometimes WALL.E by the Pixar Animation fans (you go Kate!). It does not really matter what you call him, he pretty much comes by whatever. The day before Christmas my parents adopted Walls, and thank goodness. 
The boy was seriously hurting for a home and we are on friendly terms with the K9 kind so Walls and the Beasley fam. made a great match. He is very smart and I attribute his savvy to his gypsy upbringing. His old owners were homeless, I am sorry but I can't compete with that, and they raised him right. His manners are impeccable. I am telling you this so that you will 1st) Adopt from the pound and 2nd) Try to get one raised by homeless people. No joke, homeless people take excellent care of there dogs and are always with them so what else do they do with their time...train them. And naturally...when you are living nomad style...you get really well socialized with all kinds of crowds. So Walls loves to be loved and give love. He comes when he's called, sits, stays, lays and best of all when you says "shake"...he roles over. Someone played a sick joke on him and he doesn't even know it.
Walls is clearly what I like to call...an awesome dog. He came from a shelter (Red Bluff) that euthanizes the animals when things get crowded. Unfortunately, it is one of those times where the shelter is crowded and a few other really awesome dogs are on DEATH ROW...the worst, I know... so I am going to give them a plug and hopefully they will not meet a terrible fate. Seeing as I don't live in CA at the moment...all I can do for the dogs is guilt you into giving them a home...or adopting them and then transferring them to a no-kill shelter...which I don't encourage...but might under certain circumstances.
But here they are...in all their man's-best-friend glory:
This belle dame is Carmen. She is a Pharoah Hound mix. I saw her at the shelter when we picked up Walls and she was as neat looking in person as she is in this picture. She was cool as a cucumber even though all the other dogs were peer-pressuring her to throw herself at the sides of her cage wildly and bark madly. She is 41 elle-bees (AKA lbs.) and she likes to chase tennis balls. What kind of dog doesn't? I guess that makes her "the dog next door" type.
Then to the right we have HOMER. I don't know much about him except that he looks really, really cool. He also weighs in at 69 lbs and he too like tennis balls (GET OUT! followed by Elaine Benes shove) Red Bluff pound reports that he, "wiggles with happiness." Now, and be honest with yourself, can you say "no" to a dog who wiggles with happiness? Don't deny yourself that satisfaction.
If you are wondering where the Red Bluff pound is, I have that information as well. It is located right in between, and in the same parking lot as, the Mental Health Center and the Juvenile Detention Center. You will find that Red Bluff is a go-get-'em kind of town that really likes to multitask and part of the multitasking is grouping together all life's misfits into one parking lot...they are easier to manage that way. And since I am part of the trophy generation I don't wont to hurt anyone's feelings so I will add, "Don't worry. We are all misfits...and this world is our parking lot."
And if you think I am making up this despair, you should note that in the pictures, all the dogs are wearing the same leash. They can only afford one leash! Breaks my little heart...and Jimmy is the only one with a collar because he was surrendered with it. Too sad...
The boy was seriously hurting for a home and we are on friendly terms with the K9 kind so Walls and the Beasley fam. made a great match. He is very smart and I attribute his savvy to his gypsy upbringing. His old owners were homeless, I am sorry but I can't compete with that, and they raised him right. His manners are impeccable. I am telling you this so that you will 1st) Adopt from the pound and 2nd) Try to get one raised by homeless people. No joke, homeless people take excellent care of there dogs and are always with them so what else do they do with their time...train them. And naturally...when you are living nomad style...you get really well socialized with all kinds of crowds. So Walls loves to be loved and give love. He comes when he's called, sits, stays, lays and best of all when you says "shake"...he roles over. Someone played a sick joke on him and he doesn't even know it.
Walls is clearly what I like to call...an awesome dog. He came from a shelter (Red Bluff) that euthanizes the animals when things get crowded. Unfortunately, it is one of those times where the shelter is crowded and a few other really awesome dogs are on DEATH ROW...the worst, I know... so I am going to give them a plug and hopefully they will not meet a terrible fate. Seeing as I don't live in CA at the moment...all I can do for the dogs is guilt you into giving them a home...or adopting them and then transferring them to a no-kill shelter...which I don't encourage...but might under certain circumstances.But here they are...in all their man's-best-friend glory:
This belle dame is Carmen. She is a Pharoah Hound mix. I saw her at the shelter when we picked up Walls and she was as neat looking in person as she is in this picture. She was cool as a cucumber even though all the other dogs were peer-pressuring her to throw herself at the sides of her cage wildly and bark madly. She is 41 elle-bees (AKA lbs.) and she likes to chase tennis balls. What kind of dog doesn't? I guess that makes her "the dog next door" type.
Then to the right we have HOMER. I don't know much about him except that he looks really, really cool. He also weighs in at 69 lbs and he too like tennis balls (GET OUT! followed by Elaine Benes shove) Red Bluff pound reports that he, "wiggles with happiness." Now, and be honest with yourself, can you say "no" to a dog who wiggles with happiness? Don't deny yourself that satisfaction.
Enfin, here we have Jimmy...he's a 60 pound package of what Red Bluff pound says is a "fun loving, springy step, goofy boy" and he likes to "frolic". Their words, not mine.
If you are wondering where the Red Bluff pound is, I have that information as well. It is located right in between, and in the same parking lot as, the Mental Health Center and the Juvenile Detention Center. You will find that Red Bluff is a go-get-'em kind of town that really likes to multitask and part of the multitasking is grouping together all life's misfits into one parking lot...they are easier to manage that way. And since I am part of the trophy generation I don't wont to hurt anyone's feelings so I will add, "Don't worry. We are all misfits...and this world is our parking lot."
And if you think I am making up this despair, you should note that in the pictures, all the dogs are wearing the same leash. They can only afford one leash! Breaks my little heart...and Jimmy is the only one with a collar because he was surrendered with it. Too sad...
Friday, December 12, 2008
The Granny of the Century
She's officially 100...this time it's for keeps.
G is for Grinkles, and Grinkles is for Granny Wrinkles. But you don't have many.
G is for Ganster, because you live in a place that is scary at night...and sometimes in the day, too.
G is for Give Me Some Sugar...your wish is my command.
R is for Reese's Pieces Cereal...because you like candy for breakfast.
A is for anemia, thank goodness for California peaches.
N is for nail biting tornado ride..but not for your cousin because he was too chubby.
N is for Nickelodeon and a good southern breakfast. You made my childhood complete.
Y is for Yodeling...I like it when you sing
Bonne Anniversaire!
Granny Beasley
I LOVE YOU BUSHELS
G is for Grinkles, and Grinkles is for Granny Wrinkles. But you don't have many.
G is for Ganster, because you live in a place that is scary at night...and sometimes in the day, too.
G is for Give Me Some Sugar...your wish is my command.
R is for Reese's Pieces Cereal...because you like candy for breakfast.
A is for anemia, thank goodness for California peaches.
N is for nail biting tornado ride..but not for your cousin because he was too chubby.
N is for Nickelodeon and a good southern breakfast. You made my childhood complete.
Y is for Yodeling...I like it when you sing
Bonne Anniversaire!
Granny Beasley
I LOVE YOU BUSHELS
Friday, December 5, 2008
All I Want For Christmas Is....
- Andie's Christmas CD: CHECK
- The Soundtrack and DVD to Les Choristes:
It's a beautiful story about troubled orphan
boys who are saved through the inspiration of music.
Especially one boy...who has the face of an angel,
but the character of the devil!
- Gateway battery charger:
to try to type while you have to hold the battery cord in. Spare me...
Monday, November 24, 2008
We were fated to pretend.
Once upon a time... from Capucha on Vimeo.
This little girl is a complete Dominic look-a-like and she speaks french. It doesn't get much better than this people. Plus, I can not say that I have ever heard such an interesting story from a kid before.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Check Moi
Têtes à claques
This is totally a month late, but worth the wait.
Even if you don't know French...I guess their faces are still kind of funny.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN
This is totally a month late, but worth the wait.
Even if you don't know French...I guess their faces are still kind of funny.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN
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